Best Actor - ha..ha..ha

Pernahkah Anda Tengok Baby Landak ??

Correct Way of Eating Fruits

EATING FRUIT... We all think eating fruits means just buying fruits, cutting it and just popping it into our mouths. It's not as easy as you think. It's important to know how and when to eat.. � What is the correct way of eating fruits? � IT MEANS NOT EATING FRUITS AFTER YOUR MEALS! * FRUITS SHOULD BE EATEN ON AN EMPTY STOMACH. � If you eat fruit like that, it will play a major role to detoxify your system, supplying you with a great deal of energy for weight loss and other life activities. � FRUIT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT FOOD. Let's say you eat two slices of bread and then a slice of fruit. The slice of fruit is ready to go straight through the stomach into the intestines, but it is prevented from doing so. � In the meantime the whole meal rots and ferments and turns to acid. The minute the fruit comes into contact with the food in the stomach and digestive juices, the entire mass of food begins to spoil...... � So please eat your fruits on an empty stomach or before your meals! You have heard people complaining - every time I eat watermelon I burp, when I eat durian my stomach bloats up, when I eat a banana I feel like running to the toilet etc - actually all this will not arise if you eat the fruit on an empty stomach. The fruit mixes with the putrefying other food and produces gas and hence you will bloat! � Graying hair , balding , nervous outburst , and dark circles under the eyes all these will NOT happen if you take fruits on an empty stomach. � There is no such thing as some fruits, like orange and lemon are acidic, because all fruits become alkaline in our body, according to Dr. Herbert Shelton who did research on this matter. If you have mastered the correct way of eating fruits, you have the Secret of beauty, longevity, health, energy, happiness and normal weight. � When you need to drink fruit juice - drink only fresh fruit juice, NOT from the cans. Don't even drink juice that has been heated up. Don't eat cooked fruits because you don't get the nutrients at all. You only get to taste. Cooking destroys all the vitamins. � But eating a whole fruit is better than drinking the juice. If you should drink the juice, drink it mouthful by mouthful slowly, because you must let it mix with your saliva before swallowing it. You can go on a 3-day fruit fast to cleanse your body. Just eat fruits and drink fruit juice throughout the 3 days and you will be surprised when your friends tell you how radiant you look! � KIWI: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, vitamin E & fiber. Its vitamin C content is twice that of an orange. � APPLE: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low vitamin C content, it has antioxidants & flavonoids which enhances the activity of vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack & stroke. � STRAWBERRY: Protective Fruit. Strawberries have the highest total antioxidant power among major fruits & protect the body from cancer-causing, blood vessel-clogging free radicals. � ORANGE : Sweetest medicine. Taking 2-4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent & dissolve kidney stones as well as lessens the risk of colon cancer. � WATERMELON: Coolest thirst quencher.. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione, which helps boost our immune system. They are also a key source of lycopene - the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients found in watermelon are vitamin C & Potassium. � GUAVA & PAPAYA: Top awards for vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high vitamin C content. Guava is also rich in fiber, which helps prevent constipation. Papaya is rich in carotene; this is good for your eyes. � Drinking Cold water after a meal = Cancer! Can u believe this?? For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you. It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion. Once this 'sludge' reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine.. Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal. � A serious note about heart attacks HEART ATTACK PROCEDURE': (THIS IS NOT A JOKE!) Women should know that not every heart attack symptom is going to be the left arm hurting. Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line.. You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack . Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms.. Sixty percent of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up. Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep. Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know the better chance we could survive... � A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to 10 people, you can be sure that we'll save at least one life. Read this....It could save your life!!

Loghat Daerah...

loghat daerahh...

Message: Timbul persoalan, loghat daerah
manakah yang
lebih munasabah di antara loghat utara dengan
loghat pantai timur?

Jawapannya: Loghat pantai timur (Kelate) adalah
munasabah

Bahasa Melayu standard:
"Dia pergi ke rumah jiran untuk mencari emaknya
tetapi setelah sampai di situ didapati emaknya
tiada."

Loghat Utara (kedah):
"Dia pi ghumah jiran nak caghi mak dia, pi pi mak
dia tak dak".

Loghat Pantai Timur (kelate):
"Dio gi ghumoh jire nok caghi mek dio, gi gi mek
dio tak dok."


KESIMPULAN: Tidak mungkin pipi emaknya
tiada; tetapi kalau gigi maknya tidak ada
memang munasabahlah!"

*HEHEHE......BLEH KER??

Jadikan Anak Sebagai Winner

Petua


Ibubapa adalah antara faktor terbesar dalam
menentukan halatuju anak2.
Berikut ada beberapa tips dari Robert D. Ramsey
yang boleh kita jadikan panduan dalam menjadikan
anak2 kita antara yang outstanding berbanding
rakan sebayanya..selamat mencuba!



1. Mulakanlah hidup anak anda dengan nama
panggilan yang baik .

Bila anak kita dipanggil dengan nama yang tak
baik,atau nama dah baik tapi bagi pulak gelaran
yang tak baik, itu akan menyebabkan anak jadi
malu dan rendah diri. Apatah pulak kalau yang
memanggilnama tak elok tu mak bapak sendri.
Lagi la malu kan ?Dalam Islam pun sangat
digalakkan kita bagi nama yang baik untuk
anak2.



2. Berikan anak anda pelukan setiap hari.

Ada kajian yang menunjukkan anak yang dipeluk
setiap hari akan mempunyai kekuatan IQ yang
lebih kuat daripada anak yang jarang dipeluk. Bila
kita peluk dia setiap hari esp seorang mak, anak
kita tau yang kita sayangkan dia. Dia akan tau kita
akan jadipenyokong dia paling kuat. Dia akan sedar
bahawa kita sentiasa ada jika dia kurang berjaya.
Emosi dia akan terbela.




3. Pandanglah anak anda dengan pandangan kasih
sayang.

Pandangan ini akan membuatkan anak anda lebih
yakin diri apabila berhadapan dengan persekitaran.
Memang la ada masa kita perlu marah tapi
janganlahbuat muka marah sampai kawan tu takut
nak dekat dengan kita langsung. Kesian kat budak
tu. Namanya pun budak…




4. Berikan peneguhan setiap kali anak anda berbuat
kebaikan.

Berilah pujian, pelukkan, ciuman, hadiah ataupun
sekurang-kurangnya senyuman untuk setiap
kebaikan yang dilakukannya. Bila tiap kali kita
appreciate dia, dia akan rasa nak buat lagi dan
nak buat lebih baik lagi. Ini la namanya motivasi…




5.. Janganlah mengharapkan anak anda yang
belum matang itu melakukan sesuatu perbuatan
baik secara berterusan.

Mereka hanya kanak-kanak yang sedang berkembang. Perkembangan mereka buatkan mereka ingin
mengalamisetiap perkara termasuklah berbuat silap.
Sebenarnya mereka akan belajar lebih banyak lagi
dari kesilapan yang mereka lakukan.




6. Apabila anda berhadapan dengan masalah
kerja dan keluarga, pilihlah keluarga.

Bila ada masalah eloklah kita selesaikan masalah
keluarga yang terdahulu. Kerana, seseorang tu
akan lebih tenang kalau takde masalah keluarga.
Anak2 perlu diberi keutamaan kerana mereka
sedang membesar dan proses ini akan terus berlalu
dan tak akan kembali jadi janganlah cemarkan
keperibadian mereka dengan sikap mementingkan
diri kita.




7. Di dalam membesarkan dan mendidik anak-
anak, janganlah mengeluh.

Keluhan akan membuatkan anak-anak merasakan
diri mereka beban. Ini akan menyebabkan mereka
menjauhi kita. Kalau kita tak mau sunyi dihari tua,
janganlah sunyikan mereka pada usia muda mereka.




8. Dengarlah cerita anak anda, cerita itu tak akan
dapat anda dengari lagi pada masa akan datang.

Tunggu giliran anda untuk bercakap. Ini akan
mengajar anak anda tentang giliran untuk
bercakap. Seronok sebenarnya layan bebudak
bercakap. Adik saya pun dalam kategori budak
lagi, kalau sesekali layan dia cakap rasa macam
kelakar. Saya pernah jumpa dengankawan anak
saya umur baru tiga tahun tapi mulut boleh
tahan, rasa macam tak logic je tapi
seronok. Ala, mcm aznil Tanya budak tu,
Tiger Wood berasal dari mana, pastu budak tu
jawab Zoo… untuk kita sendiri, ini adalah satu
hiburan yang tak boleh dibeli di tempat lain.




9. Tenangkan anak anda setiap kali mereka
memerlukannya.

Ada masa2nya mereka akan gundah gulana.
Ada masa mungkin diorang berselisih dengan
kawan. Ada masa mungkin dia dah tercederakan
jiran. Jadi, kita bantulah sedaya kita supaya
mereka tidak rasa sendirian dalam menyelesaikan
masalah yang bagi kita kecik tapi tu mungkin
masalah besar bagi diaorang.




10. Tunjukkan kepada anak anda bagaimana
cara untuk menenangkan diri .

Mereka akan menirunya. Jangan kita sendiri
kelam kabut bila ada yang menimpa. Jangan
kita tunjuk yang kita gelabah. Be cool!! Setiap
masalah yang telah Tuhan takdirkan pada kita
ada penyelesaiannya. Jadi, jangan gabra2.




11. Buatkan sedikit persediaan untuk anak-
anak menyambut harijadinya.

Sediakanlah hadiah harijadi yang unik walaupun
harganya murah. Keunikan akan membuatkan
anak anda belajar menghargai. Anak2 yang datang
daripada persekitaran yang menghargai akan
belajar menghargai orang lain.




12. Mereka mungkin memerlukan kita mengajar
mereka lebih daripada sekali.

Ade setengah budak kene banyak kali ajar, baru
dia faham. Macam anmum punya iklan tu..Wardina
tunjuk banyak kali baru anak dia faham. Anak
saya sendiri dalam satu hari ntah berapa kali dia
tunjuk kat mata dia suruh saya sebut eye, tunjuk
kat telinga suruh sebut ear. Jangan
marah sebab kalau marah nanti
terbantut la proses pembelajaran dia.




13. Luangkanlah masa bersama anak anda
diluar rumah, peganglah tangan anak-anak
apabila anda berjalan dengan mereka.

Mereka tentu akan merasa kepentingan kehadiran
mereka dalam kehidupan anda suami isteri. Bila
saya baca ni, rasanya tak salah la saya selalu pimpin
tangan anak2 even dalam rumah pun. Bila nak ajak
dia bangun je, saya hulur tangan. Even nak kedapur
pun untuk bancuh susu diorang.
Kalau kat luar memanglah sah2 pegang sebab
saya jenis serabut perut takut anak terlari
tengah jalan ke.




14. Dengarlah mimpi ngeri anak-anak anda.

Mimpi ngeri mereka adalah begitu real dalam
dunia mereka. Jadilah pendengar setia mereka.
Kalau pasangan kita mimpi pun apa salahnya kita
dengar. Best hape dengar cerita dari
mimpi. Macam drama tapi takde skrip, takde
director, dan takde siaran ulang tayang.




15. Hargailah permainan kesayangan anak anda.

Mereka juga dalam masa yang sama akan menghargai
barang-barang kesayangan anda. Elakkan daripada
membuang barang kesayangan mereka walaupun
sudah rosak. Mintalah kebenaran mereka sebelum
berbuat demikian.




16. Janganlah membiarkan anak-anak anda tidur
tanpa ciuman selamat malam.

Biasakan ajar dia salam kita sebelum lena. Cium
dahi diorang esp maknya...mcm cerita omputeh kan
selalu dia gi bilik tidur anak n selimutkan diaorang.




17. Terimalah yang kadangkala anda bukanlah
ibubapa yang sempurna.
Ini akan mengurangkan stress menjadi ibu bapa.
Ada masa anak kata papa ni garangla.. tu
sebenarnya dia menegur so, ubahla. Jangan jadi
too perfectionist pada anak2. Nanti mereka
rendah diri.




18. Jangan selalu membawa bebanan kerja
pejabat ke rumah.

Anak-anak akan belajar bahawa kerja pejabat
selalunya lebih penting daripada keluarga.Dan
mereka juga akan terasa kurang kasih sayang
bila kita mengadap benda
lain. Kalau anak2 dah sekolah, biasakan tolong
mereka siapkan kerja rumah, atau kita sendiri
bagi latihan dan perati setiap hari peralihan dia
belajar dari satu topik ke topik. Bantu dia belajar
lebih dari yang cikgu dia ajar.




19. Anak menangis untuk melegakan keresahan
mereka tetapi kadangkala cuma untuk sound effect
sahaja.

Bagaimanapun dengarilah mereka, dua puluh tahun
dari sekarang anda pula yang akan menangis apabila
rumah mula terasa sunyi. Anak-anak anda mula
sibuk mendengar tangisan anak mereka sendiri.
Hoo..seram. tapi ada betulnya. Buatlah sesuatu
supaya mereka tak menjauh dari kita. Semoga
kita tidak sunyi dihari tua kita.




20. Anak-anak juga mempunyai perasaan seperti
anda.

Hargailah perasaan mereka supaya mereka juga
menghargai dan memahami perasaan kita.
Apapun, saya mengharapkan semua yang membaca
akan dapat manfaatnya. Sama2 la kita berdoa agar
anak2 menjadi penyejuk mata dalam kehidupan
kita dan sebagai penenang hati didunia dan
akhirat kelak.


Suzy - memang betul apa yang ditulis pada
artikel di atas. Ia juga sebagai peringatan kepada
diri saya juga.
Memang ada juga perkara yang kita tidak perasaan
dan menganggap ianya sebagai sesuatu yang remeh.
Seharusnya kita belajar dari kesilapan. Makan
semeja dengan anak-anak adalah satu perkara
yang diwajibkan. Waktu ini kita boleh
tanya apa-apa masalah mereka. Kalau ikut
orang tua-tua dulu tak baik bercakap sambil
makan, tapi kita ubahlah agar ianya menjadi
sesuatu yang positif.

Kalau nak pergi berziarah atau kenduri ajaklah
anak-anak bersama anda, supaya mereka tahu
menghargai, menyayangi, mengenali dan yang
penting waktu bersama keluarga yang lain.
Ikatan siratulrahim itu penting. Sebab sekarang
bila ibu bapa nak pergi kenduri, anak-anak akan
ditinggalkan atau tak mahu ikut dan anak-anak
tidak mengenali sanak saudara mereka
yang lain. Ingat, anak-anak adalah pewaris.

Kawal anak-anak terutama bila mereka nak
keluar rumah waktu malam tanpa sebab.
Bila anak-anak dah di biasakan
keluar waktu malam tanpa dikawal macamana
sekali pun mereka akan keluar juga walau pun
dengan alasan nak bersembang dengan kawan2
di depan rumah.

Kenali juga kawan2 anak anda. Sesekali jemputlah
mereka makan dirumah walaupun sekadar tea o
dan cokodok je, tak salahkan.. Kenali juga ibubapa
mereka, bukan busy body tau...

1 year old girl pregnant

1 year old girl pregnant


Astonishing how a twin can find its sisters foetus….













Mengru found parasitic twin inside

Shocking event for Chinese medicine, which found that only a year a girl is pregnant,

Mengru Kang was taken to hospital after unexplained stomach was swollen much. After ultrasound, the doctors found amazed that the girl has a baby in the womb, the child's twin brother .Doctors say that the embryo was not caught in the womb and has found another

place to grow. Little will undergo a Cesarean delivery will suffer .This unusual phenomenon, very rarely is numneste "fetus in fetus" and can be met once every 500,000 pregnancies.

STUNNED doctors have discovered a one-year-old girl is carrying a BABY in her tummy. Little Kang Mengru, from China , left medics baffled after her belly became enlarged. Doctors carried out a CT scan to discover the cause of the growth and found a foetus inside her. They believe the tot is her parasitic twin. She is now waiting operation to have the tiny baby removed.

Anda Ingin Merempit ??? Tengok Dulu Klip Ini.

Suzy - apa pun yang ingin anda lakukan, sayangilah nyawa anda
hidup hanya sekali.

MUGHAL GARDENS

SUARA YANG DIDENGAR MAYAT

Yang Akan Ikut Mayat Adalah Tiga hal iaitu;

1. Keluarga
2. Hartanya
3. Amalnya




Ada Dua Yang Kembali Dan Satu akan Tinggal Bersamanya iaitu;
1. Keluarga dan Hartanya Akan Kembali
2. Sementara Amalnya Akan Tinggal Bersamanya.




Maka ketika Roh Meninggalkan Jasad ...Terdengarlah Suara Dari Langit Memekik, 'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan..
· - Apakah Kau Yang Telah Meninggalkan Dunia, Atau Dunia Yang Meninggalkanmu
· - Apakah Kau Yang Telah Mengumpul Harta Kekayaan, Atau Kekayaan Yang Telah Mengumpulmu
· - Apakah Kau Yang Telah Menumpuk Dunia, Atau Dunia Yang Telah Menumpukmu
· - Apakah Kau Yang Telah Mengubur Dunia, Atau Dunia Yang Telah Menguburmu.'




Ketika Mayat Tergeletak Akan Dimandikan ....Terdengar Dari Langit Suara Memekik, 'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan...
· - Mana Badanmu Yang Dahulunya Kuat, Mengapa Kini Terkulai Lemah
· - Mana Lisanmu Yang Dahulunya Fasih, Mengapa Kini Bungkam Tak Bersuara
· - Mana Telingamu Yang Dahulunya Mendengar, Mengapa Kini Tuli Dari Seribu Bahasa
· - Mana Sahabat-Sahabatmu Yang Dahulunya Setia, Mengapa Kini Raib Tak Bersuara'




Ketika Mayat Siap Dikafan ...Suara Dari Langit Terdengar Memekik,'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan
· - Berbahagialah Apabila Kau Bersahabat Dengan Ridha
· - Celakalah Apabila Kau Bersahabat Dengan Murka Allah
· - Kini Kau Tengah Berada Dalam Sebuah Perjalanan Nun Jauh Tanpa Bekal
· - Kau Telah Keluar Dari Rumahmu Dan Tidak Akan Kembali Selamanya
· - Kini Kau Tengah Safar Pada Sebuah Tujuan Yang Penuh Pertanyaan.'




Ketika MayatDiusung. ..... Terdengar Dari Langit Suara Memekik, 'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan..
· - Berbahagialah Apabila Amalmu Adalah Kebajikan
· - Berbahagialah Apabila Matimu Diawali Taubat
· - Berbahagialah Apabila Hidupmu Penuh Dengan Taat.'




Ketika Mayat Siap Disholatkan ....Terdengar Dari Langit Suara Memekik, 'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan..
· - Setiap Pekerjaan Yang Kau Lakukan Kelak Kau Lihat Hasilnya Di Akhirat
· - Apabila Baik Maka Kau Akan Melihatnya Baik
· - Apabila Buruk, Kau Akan Melihatnya Buruk.'




Ketika Mayat Dibaringkan Di Liang Lahat...... terdengar Suara Memekik Dari Langit,'Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan...
· Apa Yang Telah Kau Siapkan Dari Rumahmu Yang Luas Di Dunia Untuk Kehidupan Yang Penuh Gelap Gulita Di Sini
Wahai Fulan Anak Si Fulan...
· - Dahulu Kau Tertawa, Kini Dalam Perutku Kau Menangis
· - Dahulu Kau Bergembira,Kini Dalam Perutku Kau Berduka
· - Dahulu Kau Bertutur Kata, Kini Dalam Perutku Kau Bungkam Seribu Bahasa.'




Ketika Semua Manusia Meninggalkannya Sendirian... ... Allah Berkata Kepadanya, 'Wahai Hamba-Ku.... .
· Kini Kau Tinggal Seorang Diri
· Tiada Teman Dan Tiada Kerabat
· Di Sebuah Tempat Kecil, Sempit Dan Gelap..
· Mereka Pergi Meninggalkanmu. .... Seorang Diri
· Padahal, Karena Mereka Kau Pernah Langgar Perintahku
· Hari Ini,....
· Akan Kutunjukan Kepadamu
· Kasih Sayang-Ku
· Yang Akan Takjub Seisi Alam
· Aku Akan Menyayangimu
· Lebih Dari Kasih Sayang Seorang Ibu Pada Anaknya'.




Kepada Jiwa-Jiwa Yang Tenang Allah Berfirman, 'Wahai Jiwa Yang Tenang
· Kembalilah Kepada Tuhanmu
· Dengan Hati Yang Puas Lagi Diridhai-Nya
· Maka Masuklah Ke Dalam Jamaah Hamba-Hamba- Ku
· Dan Masuklah Ke Dalam Jannah-Ku'

Renungan - Utusan Kematian

(gambar hiasan)

Dalam kitab Zahrir Riyadh, diceritakan bahawa Nabi Yaakub alaihissalam bersahabat dengan Malaikat Maut. Suatu hari Yaakub dikunjungi Malaikat Maut. Dia bertanya kepada Malaikat Maut, “Adakah engkau datang untuk menziarahi atau mencabut nyawaku?”

Kata Malaikat Maut, “Untuk berziarah saja.”

Kata Yaakub, “Aku ada permintaan. Apabila ajalku telah dekat dan engkau hendak mencabut nyawaku, hendaklah engkau beritahu aku terlebih dahulu.”

Jawab Malaikat Maut, “Baiklah, aku akan utus dua atau tiga utusan.”

Ketika ajal Yaakub semakin hampir, Malaikat Maut datang kepadanya, lalu ditegur Yaakub, “Adakah engkau datang utnuk berziarah atau mencabut nyawaku?”

“Aku datang untuk mencabut nyawamu!” balas Malaikat Maut.

Yaakub kehairanan dan bertanya, “Bukankah engkau sudah berjanji akan menghantar dua atau tiga utusan terlebih dahulu?”

Malaikat Maut menjawab, “Benar dan aku telah melakukannya. Rambut hitam berubah putih, tubuh kuat berubah lemah, itu adalah utusanku kepada manusia sebelum mereka mati, wahai Yaakub.”

Hanya Allah Saja Yang Tahu

Just for Laugh - Malaysian Ah Beng

Ah Beng bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
"My Mobile No. Has changed. Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610"

Ah Beng: I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are studying him.

Ah Beng: Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Ah Beng: Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.

Ah Beng: If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Ah Beng: No, I'll also stay with your sister.

Ah Beng: People consider me as a "GOD"
Wife: How do you know??
Ah Beng: When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
Oh GOD! U have come again.

Ah Beng complained to the police: "Sir, all items are missing,
except the TV in my house."
Police: "How the thief did not take TV?"
Ah Beng: "I was watching TV news..."

Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying "Parking Fine"
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole "Thanks for compliment."

How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases
the board.

Once A Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast
announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would
be hot.

Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
Says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"

Ah Beng: Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
Ah Beng - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense
Ah Beng: The future tense is "u will go to jail"

Ah Beng told his servant: "Go and water the plants!"
Servant: "It's already raining."
Ah Beng: "So what? Take an umbrella and go."

A man asked Ah Beng why Ahmad Badawi goes walking in the Evening and not
in the morning. Ah Beng replied Ahmad Badawi is PM not AM

25 Weirdest Animals

SUN Bear

The Sun Bear (Helarctos malayanus) is a bear found primarily in the tropical rainforests of Southeast Asia .
The Sun Bear stands approximately 4 ft (1.2 m) in length, making it the smallest member in the bear family. It is often called the dog bear because of its small stature. It has a 2 in (5 cm) tail and on average weighs less than 145 lb (65 kg). Males tend to be slightly larger than females.
Unlike other bears, the Sun Bear's fur is short and sleek. This adaptation is probably due to the lowland climates it inhabits. Dark black or brown-black fur covers its body, except on the chest where there is a pale orange-yellow marking in the shape of a horseshoe. Similar colored fur can be found around the muzzle and the eyes. This distinct marking gives the sun bear its name.

Komondor Dog

Females are 27 inches (69cm) at the withers. Male Komondorok are a minimum of 28 inches at the withers, but many are over 30 inches tall, making this one of the larger common breeds of dog. The body is not overly coarse or heavy, however, and people unfamiliar with the breed are often surprised by how quick and agile the dogs are.
Its long, thick, strikingly corded white coat (the heaviest amount of fur in the canine world) resembles dreadlocks or a mop. The puppy coat is soft and fluffy. However, the coat is wavy and tends to curl as the puppy matures. A fully mature coat is formed naturally from the soft undercoat and the coarser outer coat combining to form tassels, or cords. Some help is needed in separating the cords so the dog does not turn into one large matted mess. The length of the cords increases with time as the coat grows. Shedding is very minimal with this breed, contrary to what one might think (once cords are fully formed). The only substantial shedding occurs as a puppy before the dreadlocks fully form. The Komondor is born with only a white coat, unlike the similar-looking Puli, which is usually white, black or sometimes grayish. However, a working Komondor's coat may be discolored by the elements, and may appear off-white if not washed regularly

Angora Rabbit

The Angora rabbit is a variety of domestic rabbit bred for its long, soft hair. The Angora is one of the oldest types of domestic rabbit, originating in Ankara , Turkey , along with the Angora cat and Angora goat. The rabbits were popular pets with French royalty in the mid 1700s, and spread to other parts of Europe by the end of the century. They first appeared in the United States in the early 1900s. They are bred largely for their long wool, which may be removed by shearing or plucking (gently pulling loose wool).
There are many individual breeds of Angora rabbits, four of which are ARBA recognized. Such breeds include, French, German, Giant, English, Satin, Chinese, Swiss, Finnish, to name a few.

Red Panda

The Red Panda, Ailurus fulgens ("shining cat," from a Latinized form of the Greek, ailouros, "cat," and the participial form of the Latin fulgere, "to shine") is a mostly herbivorous mammal, slightly larger than a domestic cat (55 cm long). The Red Panda has semi-retractile claws and, like the Giant Panda, has a "false thumb" which is really an extension of the wrist bone. Thick fur on the soles of the feet offers protection from cold and hides scent glands. The Red Panda is native to the Himalayas in Ne! pal and southern China . The word panda is derived from Nepalese word "ponya" which means bamboo and plants eating animals in Nepal .

Sloth

Sloths are medium-sized mammals that live in Central and South America belonging to the families Megalonychidae and Bradypodidae, part of the order Pilosa. Most scientists call these two families the Folivora suborder, while some call it Phyllophaga.
Sloths are omnivores. They may eat insects, small lizards and carrion, but their diet consists mostly of buds, tender shoots, and leaves.
Sloths have made extraordinary adaptations to an arboreal browsing lifestyle. Leaves, their main food source, provide very little energy or nutrition and do not digest easily: sloths have very large, specialized, slow-acting stomachs with multiple compartments in which symbiotic bacteria break down the tough leaves.
As much as two-thirds of a well-fed sloth's body-weight consists of the contents of its stomach, and the digestive process can take as long as a month or more to complete. Even so, leaves provide little energy, and sloths deal with this by a range of economy measures: they have very low metabolic rates (less than half of that expected for a creature of their size), and maintain low body temperatures when active (30 to 34 degrees Celsius or 86 to 93 degrees Fahrenheit), and still lower temperatures when resting. Sloths mainly live in Cecropia trees.

Emperor Tamarin

The Emperor Tamarin (Saguinus imperator) is a tamarin allegedly named for its similarity with the German emperor Wilhelm II. The name was first intended as a joke, but has become the official scientific name.
This tamarin lives in the southwest Amazon Basin , in east Peru , north Bolivia and in the west Brazilian states of Acre and Amazonas.
The fur of the Emperor Tamarin is predominantly grey colored, with yellowish speckles on its chest. The hands and feet are black and the tail is brown. Outstanding is its long, white mustache, which extends to both sides beyond the shoulders. The animal reaches a length of 24 to 26 cm, plus a 35 cm long tail. It weighs approximately 300 to 400 g.
This primate inhabits tropical rain forests, living deep in the forest and also in open tree-covered areas. It is a diurnal animal, spending the majority of its days in the trees with quick, safe movements and broad jumps among the limbs.

White-faced Saki Monkey

The White-faced Saki (Pithecia pithecia), also known as the Guianan Saki and the Golden-faced Saki, is a species of saki monkey, a type of New World monkey, found in Brazil, French Guiana, Guyana, Suriname, and Venezuela. This monkey mostly feed on fruits, but also nuts, seeds, and insects.

Tapir

Tapirs are large browsing mammals, roughly pig-like in shape, with short, prehensile snouts. They inhabit jungle and forest regions of South America, Central America , and Southeast Asia . All four species of tapir are classified as endangered or vulnerable. Their closest relatives are the other odd-toed ungulates, horses and rhinoceroses.

Hagfish

Hagfish are marine craniates of the class Myxini, also known as Hyperotreti. Despite their name, there is some debate about whether they are strictly fish (as there is for lampreys), since they belong to a much more primitive lineage than any other group that is commonly defined fish (Chondrichthyes and Osteichthyes) . Their unusual feeding habits and slime-producing capabilities have led members of the scientific and popular media to dub the hagfish as the most "disgusting" of all sea creatures.
Hagfish are long, vermiform and can exude copious quantities of a sticky slime or mucus (from which the typical species Myxine glutinosa was named). When captured and held by the tail, they escape by secreting the fibrous slime, which turns into a thick and sticky gel when combined with water, and then cleaning off by tying themselves in an overhand knot which works its way from the head to the tail of the animal, scraping off the slime as it goes. Some authorities conjecture that this singular behavior may assist them in extricating themselves from the jaws of predatory fish.. However, the "sliming" also seems to act as a distraction to predators, and free-swimming hagfish are seen to "slime" when agitated and will later clear the mucus off by way of the same travelling-knot behavior.

Star-nosed Mole

The Star-nosed Mole (Condylura cristata) is a small North American mole found in eastern Canada and the north-eastern United States . It is the only member of the tribe Condylurini and the genus Condylura.
It lives in wet lowland areas and eats small invertebrates, aquatic insects, worms and molluscs. It is a good swimmer and can forage along the bottoms of streams and ponds. Like other moles, this animal digs shallow surface tunnels for foraging; often, these tunnels exit underwater. It is active day and night and remains active in winter, when it has been observed tunnelling through the snow and swimming in ice-covered streams. Little is known about the social behavior of the species, but it is suspected that it is colonial.
The Star-nosed Mole is covered in thick blackish brown water-repellent fur and has large scaled feet and a long thick tail, which appears to function as a fat storage reserve for the spring breeding season. Adults are 15 to 20 cm in length, weigh about 55 g, and have 44 teeth. The mole's most distinctive feature is a circle of 22 mobile, pink, fleshy tentacles at the end of the snout. These are used to identify food by touch, such as worms, insects and crustaceans.

Proboscis Monkey

Nasalis larvatus also known as Long-nosed Monkey is a reddish-brown arboreal Old World monkey. It is the only species in monotypic genus Nasalis.
The most distinctive trait of this monkey is the male's large protruding nose. The purpose of the large nose is unclear, but it has been suggested that it is a result of sexual selection. The female Proboscis Monkey prefers big-nosed male s, thus propagating the trait.
Males are much larger than females, reaching 72 cm (28 inches) in length, with an up to 75 cm tail, and weighing up to 24 kg (53 pounds). Females are up to 60 cm long, weighing up to 12 kg (26 lb).
The Proboscis Monkey also has a large belly, as a result of its diet. Its digestive system is divided into several parts, with distinctive gut flora, which help in digesting leaves. This digestive process releases a lot of gas, resulting in the monkey's "bloated" bellies. A side-effect of this unique digestive system is that it is unable to digest ripe fruit, unlike most other simians. The diet consists mainly of fruits, seeds and leaves.

Pink Fairy Armadillo

The Pink Fairy Armadillo (Chlamyphorus truncatus) or Pichiciego is the smallest species of armadillo (mammals of the family Dasypodidae, mostly known for having a bony armor shell). It is approximately 90-115 mm long excluding the tail, and is pale rose or pink in color. It is found in central Argentina where it inhabits dry grasslands and sandy plains with thorn bushes and cacti. It has the ability to bury itself completely in a matter of seconds if frightened.
The Pink Fairy Armadillo burrows small holes near ant colonies in dry dirt. It feeds mainly on ants and ant larvae near its burrow. Occasionally it feeds on worms, snails, insects and larvae, or various plant and root material.

Axolotl

The Axolotl (or ajolote) (Ambystoma mexicanum) is the best-known of the Mexican neotenic mole salamanders belonging to the Tiger Salamander complex. Larvae of this species fail to undergo metamorphosis, so the adults remain aquatic and gilled. The species originates from the lake underlying Mexico City . Axolotls are used extensively in scientific research due to their ability to regenerate most body parts, ease of breeding, and large embryos. They are commonly kept as pets in the United States , Great Britain , Australia , Japan (where they are sold under the name Wooper Rooper, and other countries.
Axolotls should not be confused with waterdogs, the larval stage of the closely related Tiger Salamanders (Ambystoma tigrinum and Ambystoma mavortium), which is widespread in much of North America which also occasionally become neotenic, nor with mudpuppies (Necturus spp.), fully aquatic salamanders which are unrelated to the axolotl but which bear a superficial resemblance.

Aye-aye

The Aye-aye (Daubentonia madagascariensis) is a strepsirrhine native to Madagascar that combines rodent-like teeth with a long, thin middle finger to fill the same ecological niche as a woodpecker. It is the world's largest nocturnal primate, and is characterized by its unique method of finding food; it taps on trees to find grubs, then gnaws holes in the wood and inserts its elongated middle finger to pull the grubs out.
Daubentonia is the only genus in the family Daubentoniidae and infraorder Chiromyiformes. The Aye-aye is the only extant member of the genus (although it is currently an endangered species); a second species (Daubentonia robusta) was exterminated over the last few centuries.

Alpaca

The Alpaca (Vicugna pacos) is a domesticated species of South American camelid developed from the wild alpacas. It resembles a sheep in appearance, but is larger and has a long erect neck as well as coming in many colors, whereas sheep are generally bred to be white and black.
Alpacas are kept in herds that graze on the level heights of the Andes of Ecuador, southern Peru , northern Bolivia , and northern Chile at an altitude of 3500 to 5000 meters above sea-level, throughout the year.
Alpacas are considerably smaller than llamas, and unlike them are not used as beasts of burden but are valued only for their fiber. Alpacas only have fleece fibers, not woolen fibers, used for making knitted and woven items much as sheeps wool is. These items include blankets, sweaters, hats, gloves, scarves, a wide variety of textiles and ponchos in South America , and sweaters, socks and coats in other parts of the world. The fiber comes in more than 52 natural colors as classified in Peru , 12 as classified in Australia and 22 as classified in America .

Frill-necked Lizard

The Frill-necked Lizard, or Frilled Lizard also known as the Frilled Dragon, (Chlamydosaurus kingii) is so called because of the large ruff of skin which usually lies folded back against its head and neck. The neck frill is supported by long spines of cartilage, and when the lizard is frightened, it gapes its mouth showing a bright pink or yellow lining, and the frill flares out, displaying bright orange and red scales. The frill may also aid in thermoregulation.
They may grow up to one metre in total length. They often walk quadrupedally when on the ground. When frightened they begin to run on all-fours and then accelerate onto the hind-legs. In Australia , the frill-necked lizard is also known as the "bicycle lizard" because of this behaviour.. Males are significantly larger than females both as juveniles and when mature. The frill of the Australian frilled dragon is used to frighten off potential predators - as well as hissing and lunging. If this fails to ward off the threat, the lizard flees bipedally to a nearby tree where it climbs to the top and relies on camouflage to keep it hidden.

Narwhal

The Narwhal (Monodon monoceros) is an Arctic species of cetacean. It is a creature rarely found south of latitude 70°N. It is one of two species of white whale in the Monodontidae family (the other is the beluga whale). It is possibly also related to the Irrawaddy dolphin.
The English name narwhal is derived from the Dutch name narwal which in turn comes from the Danish narhval which is based on the Old Norse word nar, meaning "corpse." This is a reference to the animal's colour. The narwhal is also commonly known as the Moon Whale.
In some parts of the world, the Narwhal is colloquially referred to as a "reamfish."

Tarsier

Tarsiers are prosimian primates of the genus Tarsius, a monotypic genus in the family Tarsiidae, which is itself the lone extant family within the infraorder Tarsiiformes. The phylogenetic position of extant tarsiers within the order Primates has been debated for much of the past century, and tarsiers have alternately been classified with strepsirrhine primates in the suborder Prosimii, or as the sister group to the simians (=Anthropoidea) in the infraorder Haplorrhini. Analysis of SINE insertions, a type of macromutation to the DNA, is argued to offer very persuasive evidence for the monophyly of Haplorrhini, where other lines of evidence, such as DNA sequence data, had remained ambiguous. Thus, some systematists argue that t! he debate is conclusively settled in favor of a monophyletic Haplorrhini.
Tarsiers have enormous eyes and long feet.. Their feet have extremely elongated tarsus bones, which is how they got their name. They are primarily insectivorous, and catch insects by jumping at them. They are also known to prey on birds and snakes. As they jump from tree to tree, tarsiers can catch even birds in motion. Gestation takes about six months, and tarsiers give birth to single offspring. All tarsier species are nocturnal in their habits, but like many nocturnal organisms some individuals may show more or less activity during the daytime. Unlike many nocturnal animals, however, tarsiers lack a light-reflecting area (tapetum lucidum) of the eye.

Dumbo Octopus

The octopuses of the genus Grimpoteuthis are sometimes nicknamed "Dumbo octopuses" from the ear-like fins protruding from the top of their "heads" (actually bodies), resembling the ears of Walt Disney's flying elephant. They are benthic creatures, living at extreme depths, and are some of the rarest of the Octopoda species.

Sucker-footed Bat

The Madagascar Sucker-footed Bat, Old World Sucker-footed Bat, or Sucker-footed Bat (Myzopoda aurita and Myzopoda schliemanni) is a species of bat in the Myzopodidae family.

Pygmy Marmoset

The Pygmy Marmoset (Callithrix (Cebuella) pygmaea) is a monkey native to the rainforest canopies of western Brazil , southeastern Colombia , eastern Ecuador , and eastern Peru . It is one of the smallest primates, with its body length rangi! ng from 14-16 cm (excluding the 15-20 cm tail) and the smallest monkey. Males weigh around 140 g (5 ounces), and females only 120 g ( 4.2 ounces).
TDespite its name, the Pygmy Marmoset is somewhat different from the typical marmosets classified in genus Callithrix. As such, it is accorded its own subgenus, which was formerly recognized as its own genus, Cebuella.
TThe Pygmy Marmoset has a tawny coat, and a ringed tail that can be as long as its body. Their claws are specially adapted for climbing trees, a trait unique to the species. They are omnivorous, feeding on fruit, leaves, insects, and sometimes even small reptiles. Much of their diet, however, comes from tapping trees for sap. Up to two-thirds of their time is spent gouging tree bark to reach the gummy sap. The Pygmy Marmoset has specialized incisors for gouging holes in bark. Unfortunately, because of its small size, and its swift movements, it is very hard to observe in the wild.
TIn captivity, the Pygmy Marmoset can live up to 11 years.

Blobfish

The blobfish (Psychrolutes marcidus) is a fish that inhabits the deep waters off the coasts of Australia and Tasmania . Due to the inaccessibility of its habitat, it is rarely seen by humans.
Blobfish are found at depths where the pressure is several dozens of times higher than at sea level, which would likely make gas bladders inefficient. To remain buoyant, the flesh of the blobfish is primarily a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than water; this allows the fish to float above the sea floor without expending energy on swimming. The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front it.

Platypus

The Platypus (Ornithorhynchus anatinus) is a semi-aquatic mammal endemic to eastern Australia , including Tasmania . Together with the four species of echidna, it is one of the five extant species of monotremes, the only mammals that lay eggs instead of giving birth to live young. It is the sole living representative of its family (Ornithorhynchidae) and genus (Ornithorhynchus) , though a number of related species have been found in the fossil record.
The bizarre appearance of this egg-laying, duck-billed mammal baffled naturalists when it was first discovered, with some considering it an elaborate fraud. It is one of the few venomous mammals; the male Platypus has a spur on the hind foot which delivers a poison capable of causing severe pain to humans. The unique features of the Platypus make it an important subject in the study of evolutionary biology and a recognizable and iconic symbol of Australia ; it has appeared as a mascot at national events and is featured on the reverse of the Australian 20 cent coin.
Until the early 20th century it was hunted for its fur, but it is now protected throughout its range. Although captive breeding programs have had only limited success and the Platypus is vulnerable to the effects of pollution, it is not under any immediate threat.

Shoebill

The Shoebill, Balaeniceps rex also known as Whalehead is a very large bird related to the storks. It derives its name from its massive shoe-shaped bill.
The Shoebill is a very large bird, averaging 1.2 m (4 ft) tall, 5.6 kg (12.3 lbs) and 2.33 m (7.7 ft) across the wings. The adult is mainly grey, the juveniles are browner. It lives in tropical east Africa, in large swamps from Sudan to Zambia .
The Shoebill was added rather recently to the ornithological lists; the species was only discovered in the 19th century when some skins were brought to Europe . It was not until years later that live specimens reached the scientific community. The bird was known to both ancient Egyptians and Arabs however. There exist Egyptian images depicting the Shoebill while the Arabs referred to the bird as abu markub, which means one with a shoe. Clearly, this refers to the striking bill.

Yeti Crab

Kiwa hirsuta is a crustacean discovered in 2005 in the South Pacific Ocean . This decapod, which is approximately 15 cm (6 inches) long, is notable for the quantity of silky blond setae (resembling fur) covering its pereiopods (thoracic legs, including claws). Its discoverers dubbed it the "yeti lobster" or "yeti crab"[2].
K. hirsuta was discovered in March 2005 by a group organised by Robert Vrijenhoek of the Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute in Monterey , California , using the submarine DSV Alvin, operating from RV Atlantis[3]. The discovery was announced on the 7th of March, 2006. It was found 1,500 km (900 miles) south of Easter Island in the South Pacific, at a depth of 2,200 m (7,200 feet), living on hydrothermal vents along the Pacific-Antarctic Ridge[4]. Based on both morphology and molecula! r data, the species was deemed to form a new genus and family (Kiwaidae). The animal has strongly reduced eyes that lack pigment, and is thought to be blind.
The 'hairy' pincers contain filamentous bacteria, which the creature may use to detoxify poisonous minerals from the water emitted by the hydrothermal vents where it lives. Alternatively, it may feed on the bacteria, although it is thought to be a general carnivore[2] . Its diet also consists of green algae and small shrimp.